World Series Champs

The St. Louis Cardinals are World Series champions for the 11th time in franchise history, with Allen Craig's home run and David Freese's continued heroics backing Chris Carpenter's remarkably gutty short-rest start to put the Cardinals on top in one of the most incredible postseason runs in franchise history. A night after Game 6's ineffable comebacks the Cardinals took the lead early and held it, and that was all. 

The Cardinals came back early this time; with two outs Albert Pujols and Lance Berkmanwalked, setting up David Freese for yet another remarkable double for his 20th and 21st RBI of the 2011 postseason. As Chris Carpenter buckled down and began to pitch like Chris Carpenter again Allen Craig homered, capping off his own incredible World Series run, to give the Cardinals a 3-2 lead. Impressive plate discipline plated two more in the fifth, whenYadier Molina walked in a run and Rafael Furcal was hit by a pitch with the bases loaded, while Molina struck again to add a sixth run in the seventh inning.

But in the end, of course, it came down to the Cardinals' bullpen. Octavio Dotel and Arthur Rhodes staunched the Rangers' seventh-inning threat with three quick outs after replacing Carpenter. Jason Motte was as efficient as ever in the ninth inning, and when he got series nemesis Mike Napoli to fly out to Magic Turtle owner Allen Craig that was it: The Cardinals had won the 11th World Series championship in their remarkable history. 

Being a true friend

Connect with people whose friendship you value and see as sustainable long-term. Good friendships don't arise from hoping someone else's popularity or networks will rub off on you. Rather, a good friendship comes about by being with people who connect with you at level and get the person you really are. If you're trying to be friends with a person just to be accepted into a certain clique, or because you'd like to get to know someone else that he or she knows, that's not friendship – it's opportunism – and eventually you'll regret the shallow nature of your involvement. Every new person you meet has the right to be accepted (or not) on his or her own merits, so it's better to just be yourself than to let anyone else influence you into being someone you are not. In turn, you have a responsibility to fill their life with good memories and happy moments. Bear in mind it's better to be detested for who you are, than to be liked for who you aren't and good friendships withstand differences of opinion or outlooks anyway.

A dishonest person has no chance of having true friends because it's hard to rely or trust a person who doesn't behave in a supportive or trustworthy way. Keep your promises, do what you say you are going to do, and most importantly – don't lie! Lying happens in those times when you say "Okay, I will...", but you never do or you only fulfill part of what you promised. Eventually people will figure you out and realize that you don't do what you say you will. If you've found yourself lying about doing things, then not trying to keep your word, start owning up to it and stop doing it. If you can't do something, explain so and trust that the friendship is strong enough for the no's as well as the yeses. And startbeing dependable when you say that you will do something.

• If you know you were at fault for a missed opportunity, own up. Simply talk about it and hope that your friend will forgive you. They'd most likely appreciate it in the future, to look back and say, 'Wow!' I've had an amazing friend by my side.' But, if you're changing, flip-flopping and undependable – that feels like you were not a good friend.
• Good friendship is based on trust – if you break a friend's trust, the friendship may be very hard to salvage. Of course, if you have made a promise and planned to keep it, but circumstances beyond your control conspire to prevent it, let your friend know as soon as you find out. Don't wait until 15 minutes after you were supposed to arrive to call and say, "gee, I'm sorry." Instead, a quick call to say, "Hey, I know I promised to help you with whatever it is, but my husband is telling me we're going to our country house for the weekend, and leaving tomorrow just after work - that means I won't be able to make it. I'm so sorry. Can we reschedule?". That's just honoring the fact that your friend is counting on you, and respecting the fact that, given a little notice, your friend might just be able to get someone else to help with whatever it was. At least you won't be hanging your friend out to twist in the wind.

And remember the golden rule, do unto others as you would have them do unto you.

Forgiveness

Nearly everyone has been hurt by the actions or words of another. Perhaps your mother criticized your parenting skills or your partner had an affair. These wounds can leave you with lasting feelings of anger, bitterness and even vengeance — but if you don't practice forgiveness, you may be the one who pays most dearly. By embracing forgiveness, you embrace peace, hope, gratitude and joy.

Generally, forgiveness is a decision to let go of resentment and thoughts of revenge. The act that hurt or offended you may always remain a part of your life, but forgiveness can lessen its grip on you and help you focus on other, positive parts of your life. Forgiveness can even lead to feelings of understanding, empathy and compassion for the one who hurt you.

Forgiveness doesn't mean that you deny the other person's responsibility for hurting you, and it doesn't minimize or justify the wrong. You can forgive the person without excusing the act. Forgiveness brings a kind of peace that helps you go on with life.

When you're hurt by someone you love and trust, you may become angry, sad or confused. If you dwell on hurtful events or situations, grudges filled with resentment, vengeance and hostility may take root. If you allow negative feelings to crowd out positive feelings, you may find yourself swallowed up by your own bitterness or sense of injustice.


If you're unforgiving, you may pay the price repeatedly by bringing anger and bitterness into every relationship and new experience. Your life may become so wrapped up in the wrong that you can't enjoy the present. You may become depressed or anxious. You may feel that your life lacks meaning or purpose, or that you're at odds with your spiritual beliefs. You may lose valuable and enriching connectedness with others.


Forgiveness is a commitment to a process of change. A way to begin is by recognizing the value of forgiveness and its importance in your life at a given time. Then reflect on the facts of the situation, how you've reacted, and how this combination has affected your life, health and well-being. When you're ready, actively choose to forgive the person who's offended you. Move away from your role as victim and release the control and power the offending person and situation have had in your life. As you let go of grudges, you'll no longer define your life by how you've been hurt. You may even find compassion and understanding.

Holoween and co-parenting

Halloween: New Rules in Co Parenting

The month of October marks the beginning run of family holidays for the next three months. If you are a newly divorced parent, the next 120 days is going to test your patients and communication skills with your ex-spouse. Have no fear, because SingleDad is here to offer a few friendly reminders on the new rules of Co Parenting. This article blog is going to address Halloween and how important it is to establish a good relationship with your child and ex-spouse during this holiday.

Over-Communicate

If you have children 12 and under, they are most likely attending a Elementary School. This means that there will be a lot of planned Halloween activities during and after school that your child will be attending. If you are in a joint custody schedule, the key here is to “over communicate” any upcoming school functions and emails that you receive from the teacher. There is nothing more embarrassing to your child when he or she goes to class “empty handed”, especially when the classroom has a planned activity. You only need to experience this feeling once to know what I am talking about. A great way to remind your ex-spouse is to be proactive.  Send an email, voice mail or face to face communication letting each other know how important it is not to let your child feel “different” with having two households. Too many times, the backpack is not checked for fliers from school. Keep an eye on what your child brings home starting with this holiday.

Not that costume!

We have all seen how the Halloween Costume Industry has gone from innocent to indecent. As a Dad with kids, all I can say is that I am doing everything I can to slow every clock in my house and I am not prepared for my daughter to look sexy or slutty. It’s not cute to see some “pre-teen” dressed up as a “Naughty Nurse”… and believe me, I have seen this happen at my  daughter’s school. Most schools these days have enforced dress codes and some have even banned dressing up all together on Halloween. The traditional “Costume March” has left most school campuses because of the nature of some of these costumes being too violent or too provocative. As a Co Parent, both parents need to unite and be good examples of what is acceptable. It’s not going to be too cool if Dad is dresses up as a “PIMP Daddy” in front of his daughter and having to explain that the costume is more “gangster than pimp”…Don’t do this, it just doesn’t work.

Splitting Time Trick or Treating

Most divorce decrees do not address the custody schedule on Halloween, so it is up to the parents to decide what is best. My best advice is to always keep the child’s best interest in mind. Now, I am not saying, “Let the child run the show”… but what I am saying is to make sure you have a pre-determined agreement between both households and ex-spouses. If your child wants to be around familiar faces and neighbors to trick or treat with, by all means make that a priority. If one ex-spouse is residing in that neighborhood, make it a point to stay classy and offer both parents the opportunity to walk with your child together or separately. On my SingleDad Coaching calls, I have seen both parents split times and take their children through the neighborhood with positive results. Your child will thank you in the long run, (kids remember everything). If you are sharing the experience together, it goes without saying, ( but I am going to say it anyways):

·         Don’t bring a Boyfriend / Girlfriend

·         Don’t talk about Money / Un resolved Disagreements

Do opposites attract?

That old concept and expression "opposites attract" has been batted around for centuries. And in fact, it's very true when it comes to love relationships. Through  research, I have noted that people are usually attracted to their opposite on the Extraversion/Introversion and Judging/Perceiving scales. We are naturally attracted to individuals who are different from ourselves - and therefore somewhat exciting. But it's not just the exciting differences which attract us to our opposites, it is also a natural quest for completion. We naturally are drawn towards individuals who have strengths which we are missing. When two opposites function as a couple, they become a more well-rounded, functioning unit. There is also the theory that our natural attraction to our opposites is a subconscious way of forcing us to deal with the weaker aspects of our own nature. While we are highly attracted to our opposites, two opposites involved in an intimate relationship have significant issues and communication barriers to overcome. So in a sense, our attraction to the opposite personality can be seen as our subconscious minds driving us towards becoming a more complete individual, by causing us to face the areas in life which are most difficult to us.
The same cannot be said for other kinds of relationships. When it comes to work colleagues, or friends, we are not especially interested in dealing with people who are very unlike ourselves. We are most comfortable with those who have similar interests and perspectives, and we do not show a lot of motivation or patience for dealing with our opposites.